Just shut up and be happy

Do you ever tell yourself this? I do it all the time, because in the back of my mind I know that out there there is always someone who has it harder and has it worse than me. I’m not the most gracious person on Earth, especially when it comes to expectations for myself.

Today I broke down crying to Scott because I am so sick of being pregnant. I was mostly crying because I feel bad that I’m ready to have the baby out. In the beginning I was so good about being thankful when I was nauseous, or remembering how lucky I was to be blessed with this sweet baby as I was gagging my way through brushing my teeth.

But, now, 3rd trimester, I’m feeling like a wretched mom because I’m ready to be done with heartburn, backaches, spider veins, varicose veins, insomnia, fatigue, Braxton Hicks contractions, painful kicks, loss of breath, chest pain, clumsiness, muscle aches, and the inability to get anything done! I’m tired of feeling like a bad wife because I can’t do all I used to do, a bad teacher because my brain fogginess makes me not as sharp and able to recollect important facts about the English language, and a bad mom for not being ready to be a mom.

Shouldn’t I just shut up and be happy? After all,  I have a sweet baby inside me that will be fathered by the wonderful man I’m married to and we’re all healthy. Am I the only hitting my breaking point at 29 weeks? Isn’t it too soon?

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4 Comments

Filed under Our Daily Life, Pregnancy and Baby

4 responses to “Just shut up and be happy

  1. Oh Chappy. Don’t shut up and be happy. Pour out your words to our Savior. He hears. He comforts. He strengthens. There’s more to come, my friend. More to come.

  2. Chappy, I am in agreement with Keri. Wise words. And I totally understand how you feel. You are a great mom!

  3. I’ll confess – though you know well that being a mom is the most important thing I’ve done in my life (bar none) I honestly didn’t like being pregnant. At all. I never “got” how people came up with all the romance around it. Now, kids I really like, but pregnancy, not so much.

  4. Meagan Lloyd

    I think it was around 28 or 29 weeks when I hit my, “Lord, let it be over soon!” phase. I had a few rough weeks. Not that it gets better always, but I have recently been able to distract myself from the annoying/painful/irritating parts by getting stuff done for baby. Maybe I’ve adapted to the pain, but nesting has been really helpful. As far as not being a good wife, I finally came to terms with the fact that I can’t clean the way I want because bending down gives me heartburn, and that’s ok! Kendall understands 🙂 Plus, when else in your life can you say, “Cleaning gives me heartburn” and get away with it?! Press on sister! Anyone who’s been there knows it sucks! It IS punishment for sin after all (stinkin painful childbearing). But God is good, and there is still blessing in the end!

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